Unfortunately, my husband had a drinking problem that got so out of control, that it made living with him unbearable. The kid's and I never stopped loving him, but we knew that for us to be happy we had to leave. Thus begun a life of a single mother. This was not easy as my husband didn't want to let us go and live a happy life and he got very nasty. After almost 2 years we were finally getting to a place where we could talk to each other without getting angry. The kids were enjoying getting to see their father without all the fights. I found being a single parent hard, but at least the kids got to have a relationship with their father and if I needed to ask an oppinion on what one of the kids wanted to do, at least I knew that he loved them as much as me and had their best interest at heart. He still drank way too much but we got to enjoy the days that he didn't drink as much. He had an input into their lives.
Then one day this all changed. He died...... What I thought was hard, (being a single mum) became soo much harder..I became the only parent of my children. No body else had an input into their lives. There was nobody who loved them as much as me anymore. I was alone on so many levels I had never even thought of. This is my day to day life. My thoughts and fears. My tears and anxieties. I hope this will help other parents that are the only parent feel that they are not alone. It is hard to deal with guilt over work, gulit over the other parent dying and guilt over never having enough time or money. Then there is the thought of when do I start dating again. Follow me on y journey, I am sure it will be an interesting one.
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